Tuesday, December 20, 2016

Constantly traveling!

I feel like I’m scattered between places, not rooted anywhere no matter how hard I try, always on a holding pattern waiting for ‘something’ to happen, like what I’m really supposed to do or something. I feel like I’m on the ‘edge’ of something, but not quite grasping it, living, but not really … weird, can’t explain it. I felt really alive and felt like I was doing what I was supposed to be doing when we were at the mission working with them all, I feel really good when I’m helping others like that.
We’re back at mom’s (Central Point) again after having left a week ago from mom’s (last Thurs. the 15th, got here yesterday) – it’s like we’re always on the go, but not really doing what we’re really supposed to be doing. Anyway, William’s mom died Monday (in her sleep, that’s good) and William’s back totally went out on him Tuesday. Now, even though his mom died Monday, we were still planning on leaving for Crescent City on Tuesday to spend a week there working with the mission; however, when his back went out during the night and he couldn’t even move to get up, he decided that God wanted him in the valley instead for Christmas – he had to go to the chiropractor for sure now. He had been feeling like he really wasn’t supposed to go to Crescent City, been feeling like God was saying now wasn’t the time (working with the guys especially) because they would be distracted by Christmas goings ons and such (which they did have a very large turn-out for their Christmas feed and gift give away last night and their big Fairground feed today), so William was unsure until Tuesday morning, what God was really wanting us to do – come to the valley to spend time with his brothers. They weren’t doing too well with their mom’s death, plus still being homeless and having to move camp next week, plus his brothers trying to do all the after death stuff he needed to do.

Anyway, William had a most painful ride yesterday getting here and a most sleepless, painful night last night, so this morning we go to the chiropractor (who said he never seen his back that bad before – last time it went out was Dec. of ’14), who set it, but it was so inflamed and tight, it was still hard as a brick so he suggested William go to the walk-in clinic and get a prescription for muscle relaxer – which we did – 5 hours later, we finally got back to mom’s!! This medical system is sooooo messed up! It used to be you could go to a Dr., get a prescription, get in and out within an hour and done deal – now it’s such an ordeal and jumping thru this or that hoop – so stupid! Anyway, he felt immediate relief when the muscle relaxer kicked in.
Mom, in the mean time, took off yesterday morning with Albert to Portland! Here it is 2 weeks after open heart surgery and she’s off to Portland! That wasn’t bad enough, but Albert took her home from St. Helena after only 1 week! Open heart surgery and 2 major trips within 2 weeks! Crazy! Anyway, I had left St. Helena on the 9th (actually, mom did so much better after this surgery and recover really was a great deal different that the last one), got back to mom’s that night (only 7 hours to get back vs the 9 hours to get down there), then William and I went back to the coast on the 13th, thinking we were going to get things ready and go to Crescent City the 20th.
I like adventure and all, but all this running around is just too much, I just want to stay put for awhile! I hardly feel settled anywhere, always feeling like I have to be on the run all the time. I kept trying this winter to get something established in Coquille – art classes, tutoring, etc. I put an ad out there in Sept. advertising to give tutoring, music lessons, whatever, out of the “Downtown Studio” – they said I could (gave me a key and all) do whatever I wanted there, have a room even to set up an art studio, whatever. I’ve been running so much, I can’t seem to get something started. I got one kid, a 7th grader (reads at a 1st grade level), who I started tutoring Nov. 18th, only met with him that day and one other time; I had set up to meet with him again on Dec. 13th but we got in late and though I tried to get through and left 2 messages, I haven’t heard back. I don’t seem to be in any one place long enough to work with him anyway … I had someone call me about oboe lessons, haven’t heard back.
However, I’ll be getting an income again (finally!) on the 31st – we’ve been doing remarkably well since Oct. on no income – really am surprised, but not really, how God takes care of us – all of our needs are always met.
It’s just hard to plan for things really, because I tell people we’re going to do this or that, and things get changed, so how to really plan? I don’t know. Now William is talking about going to Crescent City in January, but now January is getting crazy – my daughter is flying in to stay and take care of mom Jan. 4-11th, so I’ll need to run over sometime during that to see her, and then Crescent City as well? I don’t know. William’s still talking about March-April in Crescent City. In the mean time – I still feel like I’m in limbo …

Friday, November 25, 2016

Our Daily Bread Ministries

Wow, what a week that was! We left Coquille for Crescent City on the 21st to spend the week helping at the Our Daily Bread Ministries/mission. It amazed me at how blessed we were by going there – for cooking, art, and for spiritual/counseling help, which we were able to supply, with God’s guidance and help. I brought my drawing supplies to do art therapy and I had several throughout the week take part in that, while William and I talked with and counseled several people throughout the week, as well as me doing a ton of cooking! Also, one heck of a storm came in (we ran just ahead of it all the way down 101) and the mission was open for the night – 20 additional people came in for the night. Poor William was up most all night dealing with issues!
We got there the 21st after having driving down Hwy. 101, with intermittent rain, which was a problem because of the leaky windshield. The windshield was installed wrong last year by the guy who fixed our car after the accident and the couple times this past year we’ve taken it to him to fix, he didn’t have time to fix it; therefore, it got looser to where wind would come through the sides as well as rain, which ran down into the electronics and flooded the floorboard of the car. We’ve been covering the car with a tarp for a couple months now, it would start to get dried out, then we would drive in the rain and start all over again – sometimes it would be weeks before we could get the interior dried out. Also, the electronics seem to be effected and shorting out various things off and on. So driving down the 21st (after it was almost dry again) was a problem and we got there with the interior wet again.
Anyway, we got there mid-afternoon, everyone was glad to see us. We just basically talked with people, I did art therapy with a few of the guys (there are 10 disciples staying there now), talked a lot with a new guy who had just came in also that afternoon – he’s 63, newly homeless (4 days) and so clueless as to how to live this way. After talking with him a while, we told Daphne that we thought he was a candidate for the discipleship program and recommended he stay there as well. It was almost midnight before Daphne and I got to her house (William stayed at the mission all week).
We told her we’d be back again for a week before Christmas and for 2 months in the spring and probably for a year after July of next year, but that was all we could say for now. God leads us and gives us direction and he’s given us indication that this is the schedule – God could change things up, we don’t know, but we are open for change if He so chooses.
Helping in the kitchen!

On Wednesday, I cooked and cleaned all day getting ready for the Thanksgiving feed that evening. I haven’t done that much work in months! I was exhausted! 4 turkeys was not enough (I even said earlier that day that maybe we should have made 2 more and I was right!) – there were almost a hundred in attendance for dinner. The next day, (it was prearranged) each disciple was to cook a special dish and bring it at 3 pm to Daphne’s daughter’s for a family thanksgiving dinner. So, I was in the kitchen again all day, monitoring they guys, who did quite well – they each cooked something. I taught one guy how to make bread from scratch and he took over after it rose the first time, stuffed it with blue cheese and covered it in garlic butter – it turned out incredibly awesome!
William borrowed Daphne’s truck and hauled tables/chairs to her daughter’s and I hauled people and food over. Between friends/family and disciples, the place was quite full! Daphne got there about 3:30 and pulled me aside and thanked me for taking over that morning. After dinner, most of the people left except for about 6 of us, so we sat there and played charades and cards and had fun for the evening. Me and a couple disciples got back to the mission after 10 that night, then I went back to Daphne’s. What an exhausting couple days that was!
I was actually surprised at how well I handled certain circumstances this week – when any of the guys ‘flipped’ out or ‘anger’ issues showed up. In the past, that kind of thing would pretty much shut me down, but this time, I stepped in and helped resolve situations. Like this one situation I used it as a teaching opportunity for the others and stated that in order to take command of a situation, to use the authority of Jesus He has given us – “In the Name of Jesus” – I explained that demons have to obey that authority (if we are truly saved) and leave or quit what they are doing if we, using Jesus’ name, tell them to go. It’s cool to see how I’ve grown in the Spirit and in this area to take control rather than to run.

Prayer time before dinner.

Nov. 28 – we left Crescent City and headed for the Rogue Valley early afternoon the 25th after having convened a meeting of all those at the mission, giving some instruction on repentance and revival – we gave out the pamphlets about this, and discussed how we want to come back at Christmas time and really enter into a time of prayer with all their hearts in it, to expect them to have worked through various ‘sin’ and ‘bondage’ issues, so we can see that true freedom can occur.

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Tomato, tomoto, what does it matter?

11/7/2016 by William Hayes

This morning I had a dream.  I don’t write down many dreams, but this dream has stuck in my heart so deeply.  

When I awoke this morning, I was so impacted by this dream that I couldn’t forget about it.  Though the night was restless and this one part of the dream was so vivid and real.  This dream will sound funny, because it was about a tomato plant.  The only thing that came to my mind when I awoke was to find out what was meant about a tomato.  So I felt in my spirit to go to the library and look it up.  Normally I don’t go to Wikipedia for information, but God told me to.  It would be there that I would find the answer and the dream would be interpreted.   So after I looked it up, one thing stuck out to me.  There it said that the tomato was called “the fruit of paradise,” along with the saying that goes, “tomato, tomoto, what is the difference?”  And all of a sudden, the dream made total sense.

But first, let me tell you the dream:

I was walking down a dirt road; it seemed to be near an edge of a cliff on the right side.  It was a day like a summer day.  As I was walking down this road, I noticed a tomato plant to the right on the edge of a cliff or an overhang on the road all by itself.  I thought it was strange that a tomato plant would be growing there.  It had tomatoes on it, but it looked dry like it hadn’t been watered and it seemed to be to be in trouble.  The ground under it looked unstable.  I thought to myself, “why would anyone plant it there in such a bad area.”  Then this is where the dream got strange.  I decided to rescue or save this plant.  So I leaped off the road and sprawled out, reaching around the plant as if I was going to save it from the ground, which was starting to crumble away. 

So there I am, laying on the ground, sprawled out with my arms around this tomato bush.  I began to notice the ground under it is giving way and cracks begin to form and I can see the air or open ground below it.  I started to get nervous, because if the ground crumbles, not only will the tomato plant fall off the edge of this cliff, but I too will go with it.  

The cracks grew larger and larger, I could see below, and I’m thinking, “nobody has watered this plant in awhile and it is about to perish and me along with it.”  Just about that time, I hear a voice behind me say, “What are you doing?  That’s dangerous, are you crazy?”  That was the end of my dream.  I just wanted to save this tomato plant.  That’s the dream.

The plant is the gospel and the tomato is the fruit of Christ of God’s people.  The color red of the tomato is the blood of Jesus.  The cliff is the place where careless leaders have left God’s people all alone, unwatered.  The lack of Water is the Holy Spirit that is missing from the gospel message preached today.  The crumbling of the ground around the root of the plant represents the lack of a strong and well-watered foundation of the gospel to support the people or church of Christ.  The cracks represent the church about to loose it’s foundation of the Word of God in a dry and parched ground and the falling away from the Truth of Jesus Christ’s true gospel.   I was representing the few who are willing to put their lives on the line at any cost to save God’s people and reaching out to the lost from falling away at this hour.  Though I’m not saying this to puff up myself, but few are willing to carry their cross and be fools and spectacles before angels and men.  The voice represents the world, the enemy, and the flesh saying constantly to us, “what are you doing?  That’s dangerous, are you crazy?”

Let us tell the people of God the whole hard truth, and quit watering down the Gospel of Jesus Christ!  Because Jesus is saying:

Mat 25:30-36  “And cast ye out the unprofitable servant into the outer darkness: there shall be the weeping and the gnashing of teeth.
But when the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the angels with him, then shall he sit on the throne of his glory:
and before him shall be gathered all the nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as the shepherd separateth the sheep from the goats;
and he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left.
Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:
for I was hungry, and ye gave me to eat; I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink; I was a stranger, and ye took me in;
naked, and ye clothed me; I was sick, and ye visited me; I was in prison, and ye came unto me.”

Read the whole chapter of Mathew 25, it is very direct!

James 2:14-26   “What doth it profit, my brethren, if a man say he hath faith, but have not works? can that faith save him?
 If a brother or sister be naked and in lack of daily food,
  and one of you say unto them, Go in peace, be ye warmed and filled; and yet ye give them not the things needful to the body; what doth it profit?
Even so faith, if it have not works, is dead in itself.
Yea, a man will say, Thou hast faith, and I have works: show me thy faith apart from thy  works, and I by my works will show thee my faith.
Thou believest that God is one; thou doest well: the demons also believe, and shudder.
But wilt thou know, O vain man, that faith apart from works is barren?
Was not Abraham our father justified by works, in that he offered up Isaac his son upon the altar?
Thou seest that faith wrought with his works, and by works was faith made perfect;
and the scripture was fulfilled which saith, And Abraham believed God, and it was reckoned unto him for righteousness; and he was called the friend of God.
 Ye see that by works a man is justified, and not only by faith.
And in like manner was not also Rahab the harlot justified by works, in that she received the messengers, and sent them out another way?
 For as the body apart from the spirit is dead, even so faith apart from works is dead.”

Hebrews 11:30-40, 12:1-4  “By faith the walls of Jericho fell down, after they had been compassed about for seven days.
By faith Rahab the harlot perished not with them that were disobedient, having received the spies with peace.
And what shall I more say? for the time will fail me if I tell of Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah; of David and Samuel and the prophets:
who through faith subdued kingdoms, wrought righteousness, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions,
quenched the power of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, from weakness were made strong, waxed mighty in war, turned to flight armies of aliens.
Women received their dead by a resurrection: and others were tortured, not accepting their deliverance; that they might obtain a better resurrection:
and others had trial of mockings and scourgings, yea, moreover of bonds and imprisonment:
they were stoned, they were sawn asunder, they were tempted, they were slain with the sword: they went about in sheepskins, in goatskins; being destitute, afflicted, ill-treated
(of whom the world was not worthy), wandering in deserts and mountains and caves, and the holes of the earth.
And these all, having had witness borne to them through their faith, received not the promise,
God having provided some better thing concerning us, that apart from us they should not be made perfect.
Therefore let us also, seeing we are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,
looking unto Jesus the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising shame, and hath sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
For consider him that hath endured such gainsaying of sinners against himself, that ye wax not weary, fainting in your souls.
Ye have not yet resisted unto blood, striving against sin:”


Rom 12:1  “I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service.” 

From Jesus Christ’s sacrifice, to the disciples sacrifices, to the early Christians sacrifices, and now our brothers and sisters suffering around the world! 

I speak this to the arm chair Christian, pew sitting believers in America.  Why won’t we lift a finger to save a soul or even do what it takes to save their own nation.  So when and how will we bring glory to the Lord Jesus Christ?!

Tuesday, November 8, 2016

Walk on Water!

Study this morning over Mark Chs. 6-8: Walking on water, disciples called out in fear. Jesus answered don’t be afraid. I am with you. Just like today’s “storms of life” we are not to be afraid. Today being election day, it could turn to evil and the ushering in of the tribulation (Hillary) or it can turn to good and the rebuilding of what the evil has done (Trump). Judgment has fallen on the leadership of this nation – are we to suffer more today or later – it will come, tribulation, persecution of Christians in this country, but first, the greatest revival of all history will be ushered in. Prophetic utterances all over this nation as much as 35+ years ago (that I’ve heard), have all said the same thing (and of course, the Bible has also said), that in the last days, we are on the verge of the greatest, biggest revival of all of history!
Them (the disciples) being full of fear, looking at the bad, the circumstances around them, thinking Jesus was a ghost, walking out of the darkness on the water, in the mist. No different today; like us focusing on the bad instead of what God is doing. They cried out in fear. Not to Jesus/God, but just cried out in fear. When we cry out, freaking out about fearful stuff around us, who/what do we cry out to?
Immediately when Jesus spoke, they recognized Him, only then did things calmed down. We need to ‘listen’ to Jesus instead of ‘struggling’ against the winds of life. He could have passed them by, left them in fear, but He didn’t. They cried out, and He heard! If we see Christ in EVERY situation because God is in control, then we need not fear.
Like the video we just watched last night (Story of Daniel on uTube) of nations rising and falling, all ordained by God, leaders put into place BY GOD, whether we like it or not, to FULLFILL HIS purposes.
Greatest evangelist of all times is John the Baptist and Paul – were executed! Who are we to think we are any different? God was in control and still is in control, and the story impacts more BECAUSE of their deaths, many people were won after and because of their sacrifice! Like the stories in the Foxes Book of Martyrs, who are we in America to think we are any difference? Like the Word says, the world hated Him (Jesus), so too will they hate us.

Beach in Bandon

Friday, October 14, 2016

Victory over Storms in our Lives!

Wow, I love how God works! William and I spent some awesome time in the Word Tues. and Wed., mostly in the minor prophets. God wants us to do a thorough study of Hosea and the other prophets of that time period. Also, God has been speaking to William and has been telling him some incredible things. There are so many parallels to today and the USA that it is uncanny! We (the USA, esp. leadership) are under judgment and big time bad stuff is coming VERY soon and we as a nation are about to have our world turned upside-down … God has been trying to call us to repentance for years, but people want to be on their downward destruction path.  But before the 'big-time bad stuff', God is pouring out His Spirit in a BIG way and the biggest revival is about to hit this country!
We are to spend the next 5 months really studying God’s Word, getting closer to Him than ever before. What is coming next spring is big – we are to get out there and really preach – William has to psych himself up big time because he believes he will be arrested and beat up for preaching the gospel. It is finally coming to that, we’ve known it all along.
Yesterday, we left Coquille around 7 am and headed for Crescent City since I had been asked months ago to speak at a Women’s meeting at the Cornerstone Church there. We left so early because a major storm was to hit (actually, it started raining in buckets late the night before) with winds at 80 mph around 11 am. As it turned out, we drove in a lot of winds; however, we could tell we were right ahead of the storm. We stopped for breakfast in Gold Beach and when we hit the road again, the winds were doubled. We got to Crescent City about 10:30 and the storm had followed us. Throughout the day, it increased and last night, it was massively huge and awesome. Mom even called me and said that the news was calling it even bigger than the ’64 flooding (which I remember in Ashland) and it was to affect the whole of southern Oregon/Northern CA. Should be interesting traveling to the Rogue Valley after leaving here!
We roamed a bit/went out to lunch before heading to the mission. We hung out there for awhile and Daphne showed up and I went with her – to her house, then to the church to set up for the 6pm meeting, while William stayed at the mission. I had been seeking God for some time now as to what He wanted me to speak on and at this point, I still didn’t know what scripture to base it on. The theme was Tie-die and I was trying to come up with something; yet at the same time, wait on God to show me what he wanted me to say.
At this point, the storm was so intense, winds had to be over 60 mph at this point. Only about 15 women showed to the meeting. Daphne prayed over me (as did Catherine) and Daphne said that the Spirit of God was all over me so don’t worry about what I was to speak about, God would give it to me. I wasn’t that worried, I knew God would, it was just a little unnerving. I was struck by Haggai (I had turned right to it when I was talking to God) esp. vs 5-11. Sure enough, when I got up, I spoke of several related things ending with the fact that God wants obedience and repentance and that it must start within the church. I told them that our world was about to be rocked and we had to be ready to be that light to those who were going to be out there freaking out. Since I had not put a mark into Haggai, I kept trying to find it while I was talking, so I mentioned how God’s glory has left the temple and we needed to be obedient and repentant to see God come back. In other words, the Holy Spirit – the church tends to ‘work up the Spirit’ and say he is present, when all the while he is not. I kept bring up the parallels of the minor prophets to our time now and instead of looking to the future with fear, we are to see it in faith, that we are in line with God’s will and that as we rise up in faith and be that light, God will guide us through. All through the talk I kept trying to find Haggai again and finally Catherine grabbed my bible and found it for me, but by then I didn’t feel drawn to share those verses. It was rather funny, because I never actually ‘read’ the Word, just gave the message.
South Beach, Battery Point Lighthouse in background.

Anyway, Daphne said it was exactly what everyone needed to hear. After I was done speaking a hot flash hit me real hard, had me sweating and shaking. I was sitting there and all the people gathered around me to pray and I felt great (but drenched in sweat). After that, I had a chill hit me that just wouldn’t leave. After leaving there, we went to the mission to check on things, since the doors were open for the homeless to spend the night. As I was walking into the door, one of the people were outside smoking and he looks at me and said, “I don’t know who you are but God is all over you.” I just smiled at him and said hi and went in. The place was packed with people, beds laying out everywhere, general chaos, but happy. William was all fired up and talking with the people – he said he was having a great time.
Later that night, Daphne and I were talking about many things; she mentioned how she believed that because of my past, I have a special anointing against the spirit of depression, that spirit could not stay around because of it (I have noticed that – it must have grown over the year because no matter what, I haven’t felt that depression try to take me over in well over a year now.) She believes that as God presents the opportunity to me, I pray over people and it will leave.
William had an incredible time spending the night at the mission – he said that he ministered to so many people there (19 came to stay because of the storm + the 8 disciples, 2 leaders, and him) – full house! There is such a need for mature Christian men to step up and disciple the people there, including the leaders! William and Jasper even had to get up on the trailer parked there at 1 in the morning to tie a tarp down on it since it was leaking so bad (since a couple lives in there).
South Beach after the storm!

Sunday, October 9, 2016

God is Great!

Wow, what incredible ‘God connections’ we’ve had this week – the Holy Spirit was operating BIG TIME and totally blew me away! First off, Wednesday, I think it was, we were down at the auto shop checking on our RV again (we had taken it in for a $200 break job that turned into a 2 ½ week $900 ordeal) and met up with a homeless guy who was living in the back of his truck (small canopy) there to get a transmission job (they even let him stay nights in his rig while they were working on his rig); anyway, we got to talking to him (he’s one of those ‘universalist collective thought’ people, but a very nice guy, so we’re talking to him about God, like we always do, and so on, but we could tell that God was working on him through what we were saying. Then we got to talking about his living situation and how he freezes during the winter and I told him about my ‘hot pads’ I had made that we put on our windows for insulation, showed them to him and he got all excited when I told him I would make him some, custom, for his rig, no charge. He couldn’t believe that I would do it for him – I told him, he gets the fabric and I’ll make it for him. Then he told us he was living in Port Orford and I said, “no problem, I’ll just drive down there if you just cover gas for me – it’s only an hour away.” He was blown away that I would do this for him and I said that God was doing it through me. So we exchanged phone numbers and parted and since it was a rainy day and William couldn’t finish the roof or deck on the house he was working on, we decided to go to Coos Bay to take our showers (we’re back to once a week showers in Charleston) and run a few errands. Since we had skipped breakfast and didn’t have much $$ since we were saving up for that $900 job, we decided to go to the cafĂ© in North Bend that serves meals for $1.50 each.
So, we’re sitting there and all the tables are full, so a lady comes in and asks if she could sit with us. We got to talking, and as we always do, got to talking about God. She was very guarded and tested us on several areas. As the conversation continued, everyone started opening up and the Holy Spirit really touched us all in a powerful way and after an hour or more of sitting there, our conversation was heard by those around and it seemed to be having an effect on them as well. So much was said, I can’t even remember it all, but basically she realized William was a Prophet and was overwhelmed by the fact he pegged a few things about her/for her when she was sharing about demon visitations, and such. Anyway, she knew he was the real deal and we agreed that we would meet again, because William said God had a special message for her, but he wanted to be sure, to go into prayer so as not to make a mistake with the message.
As it all ended, we were all practically in tears by the power of the Holy Spirit and went outside for a ‘God huddle’ and prayer. What powerful prayer we had! This one homeless guy was walking back and forth behind us watching us, another was standing nearby watching. I was so overcome by it all, I was shaking, yet so excited to finally meet someone in this area on the same page as us! We all parted, having exchanged numbers, all very overwhelmed by the power of the Holy Spirit.
The next day, she contacted me and was so happy to have met us, and wanted to meet again. We chatted for a bit and I told her I’d call when I was coming out that way again. The next day she had called again, and asked if I’d meet her Saturday at the Methodist Church (where they serve a free lunch), and I said I would.
woodpecker in the orchard
I got there before her but obviously God set this up this way. I sat at a table with 2 guys, to whom I said hello. When the one asked how I was, I said, “blessed” like I usually do. He was thrown off by that, kind of gave a sarcastic chuckle and said that was good for me, but he wasn’t. He spoke of how everything he owned was ripped off that morning, his electronics, jacket, his clothes, etc and etc. All he had left was his sleeping bag, only because he was in it. He was visibly upset. I really don’t know all I said, but the Holy Spirit took over and wow, blow me away, God ministered to that guy in a powerful way. By this time (it seems to happen when the Holy Spirit takes over), I was shaking all over and about that time, my friend came in and sat down. I said hello to her and asked her if she would join me in prayer for this guy because he had just had everything he owned stolen. She agreed and I prayed. I didn’t really ignore her, but I continued talking with the guy, and he, by this time, was obviously overcome and was trying not to cry. I handed him a $20 and he did start crying. I said a few more things about how God was going to bless him and he left, carrying a few clothes and a jacket he had gotten from the Methodist Church.
I then turned to her and we started conversing. She told me she didn’t believe his story and that ‘she knew homeless and their ways,’ and that he was pulling my leg. I honestly didn’t buy that, but she obviously has a hurt past of something that made her say such a thing. Anyway, we got past that and we had the most wonderful conversation. She didn’t open up to me much, but me, being such a talker, just kept sharing stories about myself, which I believe God had me share, because it all ministered to her in such a way that I could see she had the same/similar experiences. The more we talked, the more excited she became that she ‘finally had a friend’, a peer, as she said, that she could relate to. She told me that she’s tried for 37 years to find a real friend and she believed that I was finally one for her.
She basically let me do most of the talking. Anyway, at the end of our time (this was probably about an hour or so later), God told me to sing her a song – now this has never happened to me before, but I did as I was asked, told her that I was to do this. She kind of looked at me funny, and said ok, so I told her about Paul Wilbur and what an anointed, blessed songwriter/performer he was and then started to sing: Barruch Haba (Blessed is he who comes) – I didn’t remember all the words to the main verse, but God had me interject his own special message in the couple places I couldn’t remember – and it flowed naturally as if it was supposed to be there. I could hardly get through it, from wanting to cry, but I did, and afterwards we were both in tears. I really wasn’t paying attention to those around us, but the room was silent (which normally quite loud). She was so overcome, we basically cleaned up our places, gave each other a hug and headed to our cars.
I don’t know what God was doing with all this, but I was so overwhelmed by it all, I was shaking most of my drive home. That night, she sent me a couple of texts about how blessed she was by our meeting.
deer in the orchard
Pretty much this whole summer, we got caught up in doing the ‘world’ thing of working and whatever and didn’t spent our usual time in the Word, listening to sermons, etc and etc. and so this summer became a ‘dry’ time for both of us. Sure, we had a good summer overall, William’s wore out from working pretty steady the last 6 months, but spiritually, it was very dry. We both lamented the fact, but didn’t put much effort toward solving the issue until about 2 weeks ago or so, when we started back into listening to sermons, getting into the Word, praying together, etc. The enemy had pretty much left us alone much of the summer because we weren’t out there making an impact spiritually for the most part. However, the attacks sure did start up again this past week! William’s got walking pneumonia again – he’s weak, coughing up tons of green chunks, lungs feel heavy, etc. but he’s still pushing himself to get this job done – he would have been done already if it hadn’t been for the rain the past couple weeks off and on. Not only that, but the enemy has been tormenting our dreams/sleep again and causing little things to happen to irritate or make things harder for us. He’s mad at us for making impacts again! Oh well, bring it on! There is NO stopping us! He only does what God allows him to do and we have been through this enough to know the routine.
This morning in prayer time, we read/prayed Ps. 91 over us again (we hadn’t done that in a long time). William went to work anyway since it was sunny today – he’s on the roof finishing that, finished the deck this morning. Anyway, he only has a day or so more of work. However, he has to go into the hospital tonight and get himself an antibiotic. The treatments we did this week got things started, but he’s at the point he needs an antibiotic. Because I had been researching herbal remedies/collecting herbals, oils, etc. he’s been taking in eucalyptus and juniper steam treatments and I’ve been doing percussions on his back every night – it helped, loosened things up for him, but he just can’t breathe! He’s had constant headaches which tells him he is oxygen deprived. He’s constantly on his breathing machine lately. I gave him an iron tablet this morning to help him with some energy.
Not only all this, but when we brought the RV back on Friday from getting new breaks, we parked it beside the trailer, because we’re going to keep a 10’ space between the two, and between putting up the 2 canopies we have and tarp over it all between the two rigs, then enclose it with shower curtains, etc., we’re creating a new room between to use during the winter. We haven’t started all that yet, but anyway, William drove the RV up and parked it.

Oct. 11 – because of all the “God Highs” lately, of course the enemy had to attack. Sunday night I had to take William to the emergency room because he has walking pneumonia! And of course, the Dr. couldn’t just take the word of a patient and had to ‘educate’ William on all he knew about asthma etc and etc. William was obviously in pain, knew what he was talking about, but he just played the Dr. out until he got what he wanted in the first place: antibiotic and predneszone for his chest. The effect was almost immediate, with William actually able to sleep the night through for the first time in 3 weeks, didn’t hack up a lung constantly, etc, which of course, gave him the energy he needed the next day and ability to breath! Like he said, no wonder he’d gone through 2 inhailers this past month and was taking 8 treatments a day on his machine. He just needed that swelling to go down.
I hadn’t been able to sleep the past 3 nights due to back to back hot flashes all night long! Headaches and nausea. We went out to breakfast today and I couldn’t even keep it down! My body is all messed up from menopause; however, this is over the top!

Sunday, July 24, 2016

Summertime Along the Coast!

God puts us through ‘seasons’ in life to teach us, and each season is important and beneficial – both good and bad.  We are going through a ‘dry’, hard working (William), preparation time right now.  Dry, in that we have felt isolated (very few friends that we can really talk to that are like-minded, no one really to ‘hang out’ with) and William, especially, too tired to get into the Word like we had been.   We are still in Coquille, with William working hard re-doing a house, and me ‘working’ a great garden (drying/canning veggies and fruits – try that in a small RV!) with additional access to multiple fruit trees/bushes.  In addition, swimming (for exercise) at the local pool most every day AND hanging out at the Coquille Valley Art Center as an artist and a teacher.  I have been there no more than a month and they’ve got me teaching already!  I’ve been producing some real cool art as well :)    

The reason I write and to share my journal is that it is a ‘growth experience’ for me as well as to let others know they are not alone – that as humans, we all go through similar feelings and experiences.  I do this to, hopefully, encourage someone ‘out there’.   I vary rarely get feedback, so encourage me by leaving some feedback and let me know if anything that I write helps.

My highlight for this month as to be my trip to Crescent City.  Here are excerpts from my journal:
July 7 – wow, what a day!  I came down to Crescent City (William stayed in Coquille to work) yesterday to join Rachel [from http://dailybreadcc.org/  - awesome ministry]  on the beach for her birthday party/Sozo painting experience.  That was awesome, but today, I attended a meeting of a bunch of women (incl. Daphne) at Donna’s house (she had invited me to such a meeting back in March and for some reason I couldn’t come) and it was what I needed!  I have felt so ‘dry’ lately, not even able to write I’ve been so ‘dry’ – it’s because I have no friends, mingle with no one except William for the most part and we have no fellowship to ‘plug’ into to get ‘fed’ or even ‘support’ in what we do.  This group of like-minded believers is what I needed.  We started the meeting around 11:30 and didn’t end until 4:30 – it was awesome all the way through.

I had come down yesterday at Donna’s invitation, but right after her invite, Rachel invited me to her thing, so I left a day early for that.  Rachel, Daphne and a few others went to Bethel in Redding last weekend and had a totally blessed time.  They attended this Sozo event (prophetic painting) class where they were taught how to paint prophetically – Daphne’s going to explain this to me more this weekend.  I’m staying at Donna’s house until tomorrow, then going to Daphne’s for the weekend.  I stopped first as I came into Brookings, at Donna’s house and ‘checked-in’ sort of speak, since I’m staying with her.  I invited her to this painting event as well, so around 3:30 we end up in Endert’s Beach in Crescent City, where we found Rachel and another person already painting, so we joined in.  I kind of instructed Donna with her painting and Rachel asked me for some help as well.  I, in the mean time, am trying to paint what I see down the beach and on the horizon, but God kept ‘messing me up’ by blowing my canvas board into the sand, of course, ruining my attempts – not once, but 3x.  By the 3rd time, I realized I’m missing the point of this ‘Sozo’ type painting – I have to be free, not bound by the restraints I kept trying to put myself under.

So last night, I was reading in Donna’s book: Blessing your Spirit by Sylvia Gunter and Arthur Burk, wow I need to get this book and really delve into it.  I was just looking at p. 5 and this is what I really needed to see:  “I bless you with a life-giving community to fit into.  You have a piece to put into a mosaic, and I bless you with fitting together with other people, because you can’t do what God has called you to do alone.  I bless you with finding like-hearted, like-visioned, like-spirited others.  I bless you with being part of a family …”

That’s what we’ve been missing!  We’ve known this, we’ve talked about it, but we’ve had such a hard time over the years trying to even talk with anyone on the same page – it’s so hard to find the ‘real’ believers!  I’ve got Bobbie and Bethany in Medford, and then Jerusalem Center in Central Point, but William has no one and where we are in Coquille, the ‘church’ is so dead, we can’t even begin to connect with anyone there (we tried last year and this).  I knew back in March, I needed to spend more time in Crescent City because I so very much connect with Daphne and Reba especially, then a few weeks ago I felt a real need to come down here and then Donna called me a couple weeks ago about this meeting today and then on the tail of that, Rachel contacted me to come to her thing, so I knew then I had to come down.  I realize now how important being around life-filled believers is – I need to make this trek more often, so does William.

Anyway, during the meeting today, this one lady, really connected with me.  She had gone to our Easter service in March and was very much affected by us, she said.  She has a lot of issues, but is really on fire for God, so when she came over to talk with me, she just put her hand on my shoulder and started crying, then asked for prayer.  I started praying for her, I don’t even remember what, and she started really crying – I guess God hit it on the nail for her because she was greatly affected by it all, she hardly wanted to break away when I was done praying, she just kept holding onto me.   … I feel so blessed and humbled and blown away when this sort of thing happens.

One of the things we also did at the meeting was this ‘game’ – Donna asked 3 questions and we had to share the answers:  She said to sit quietly and ask God 1) if I can play any game with you, what would it be.  God immediately brought to my mind the picture of Jesus and me running, romping through the field, laughing, jumping, etc.  The next question 2) why did you show me this?  God immediately said that I needed to live in pure freedom.  And the 3rd ) What are you trying to teach me/bring me to?  And He said: It’s all about freedom.

Considering I’ve spent most of my life ‘in chains’ so to speak, this area of freedom is a big deal [only the last 10 years have been truly free].  I mentioned earlier in the meeting some about the years of abuse and my journey into freedom, especially the past few years, so this was right on.  The book:  Mountain of Spices by Hannah Hurnard came up and the part of the story Donna mentioned really rang true for me, making me realize how a couple weeks ago, William brought in the book Hind’s Feet on High Places – he had found it in [the house he’s working on].  The timing was interesting, and I believe I need to read that book again (I read it sometime in the 80’s I remember was greatly affected by it)  – I owned it for years, but it was one of the many books I got rid of last fall due to not needing to keep so much ‘stuff’.  However, I thought at the time I needed to read it again, now I know I need to as well as its sequel.

July 10 – wow, what an adventure this has been!  Fri. night I stayed with Daphne and wow, what an anointed time we had!  I need to spend more time with her and some of the other people here.   We got to her house from Daily Bread (I’ll tell about this later) a little before 8pm and we sat and talked (sharing what God has done for us over the years/our story, etc).  … Such an awesome time.  The next morning was a continuation of awesome sharing and reading from the Word and various books she had (below).  Through our sharing and praying together, God revealed many powerful things to us.

She had to get ready to go to [CA] because her grandfather was dying of cancer and she, her daughter, and granddaughter were heading down there later in the afternoon).  I left around 11:30; she had asked me if I would stop by the ministry, pray and anoint the building and whoever wanted prayer before I left town (she handed me a bottle of anointing oil).  I was very apprehensive at first and really didn’t want to, but I knew God had something special He was doing through this, so I said ok.  Wow and wow!  What an experience!  When I got there, a new disciple was sitting on the ground against the building outside, so I went up to him, put my hand out and said, “[I called him by name], I bless you in the name of Jesus” – what amazed me is that I normally don’t say that to people, it just came out that way!  It absolutely shocked him, he sat staring at me speechless for a minute, then he got this big smile and thanked me.  I don’t think he remembered me from the previous night since he was rather distraught, so he had no idea who I was.  I went into the building and saw Chrissie (the wife of the couple I met in March who had walked from Seattle to CC (March 12 entry) coming from the dining area in tears (she’s now a disciple and works in the thrift store – I talked with her the night before and she said she was very happy and doing great).  I asked how she was and she gave me a hug and told me how she had just blown up at [one of the disciples] and that it was in appropriate, she caught herself and apologized to him, but was still beating herself up, so I told her, “Don’t beat yourself up.  It’s a done deal, you caught yourself, apologized, all is forgiven, now go on and let it go.”  It took her a few seconds to soak that in and then smiled through her tears, hugged me again, and thanked me.  I then said, “how are you,” and she answered, “ok” and I said, “no, how are you.  Blessed,” I added.  She smiled, got what I was saying and I asked her again, “how are you,” and she answered “blessed.”  During that time, I had my hand on my shoulder and she said that as soon as I touched her, she felt very ‘light’ – she explained that it was like she was floating.  I asked her if she wanted me to pray and anoint her.  She really wanted that and hugged me again and said what a blessing I was to her.  So we prayed and while I was anointing her, God said some things through me over her (I don’t remember what all I said), but it touched her spirit in a profound way and she started crying again, but this time was thanking God and me and hugging me.   

We talked for a bit, and [another disciple came in].  He was in a fairly good mood and I asked if he wanted prayer.  I anointed him and prayed and again, God spoke some profound things, including calling him a mighty warrior like Gideon (and he knew the story and related it in detail to Chrissie when she asked after we were done praying).    It was a powerful thing for him and he started crying and hugging me.  By this time, I was in a mode of ‘wow, this is amazing’.   I told them I was going to go around and anoint the building and cast out the demons.  I started with the one door, went back outside, saw [the first one I talked to] still sitting there and asked if he wanted to be anointed and prayed for.  Again, God spoke through me and it had a profound effect on him.  By then [someone else] was out there along with [another] and I prayed for them.  They both said they got goose bumps and that’s when [the first one I prayed for] smiled and said that happened to him as well.  I hugged them and then I anointed the other door praying, and went inside and started praying over the place and anointing all the doors, then all the tables asking God to bless and speak to everyone to came in the place and sat at these tables.  By then, [another disciple] came up and wanted prayer.  [Another] walked by and I asked him if he wanted prayer, he walked around for a few seconds, looking down, and said, “no, my dragon wouldn’t let me do it.”  I just smiled and prayed silently for him and said that when he was ready, let me know.  There was such an atmosphere of peace when I got ready to leave, as all the people there sat down for bible study.

As I got ready to leave, Chrissie said to me something like (I can’t remember the exact words because whenever someone compliments me, I still tend to look down and don’t receive it very well – I need to keep working on receiving compliments properly), “you have such an amazing aurora around you.”  (what’s amazing is that Daphne said the same thing the night before).  “It is one of peace, kindness, and compassion.”  Wow, I went away from this entire encounter totally amazed and blown away.  Every time I would think of it as I was driving to the Rogue Valley, I would get all choked up, but I was driving so I kept it held back [so I could drive].  

I’m going to go back and tell about the experiences Fri.-Sat.:  When I left Donna’s house on Fri. morning, I went to Daily Bread, because I had told Rachel and Daphne on Wed. that I would set up an ‘art day’ at the ministry for the people.  So I got there around 1 pm and set up my drawing and painting supplies and invited those who were there to sit and draw/paint with me.  [The first one who sat with me] was so excited to show me some of his artwork.  It had great meaning for him.  He was proud of his work – I told him he did an awesome job with it.  He went onto explain some of the pictures.  I then sat down and explained to him how to use the various pencils so as to help him improve upon his work.  So he started drawing and applying what I was showing him, he really enjoyed himself.  A bit later, some of others joined me.  They really loved the experience.  Around 3:00, Daphne came in and said she was going to hold group time in the main eating area (where we were doing art) because she wanted to do a ‘art sozo’ project (kind of like art therapy).  We read from a book and had group discussion time (I still need to get the name of that book, it was very good).  It was a very large group and they all seemed to really get into it all.  She then introduced the art sozo and I got supplies on the tables (primary/secondary colors – acrylics, paper, brushes, water).  She had everyone take a piece of paper and fold it into 4s, to write anger, joy, sadness, peace on the 4 corners.  Then, one-by-one with about 2 minutes for each, she said to take a brush and pick 1 color to describe each feeling.  This experience was quite revealing for each.  As they went around and talked about each person’s work, it was very good for them all.  Daphne was quite excited, since this was the first time she’s done something like this.

After group was over, I cleaned things up and hauled them out.  I had been asked to do music and preach and I still had no idea what to do.  I didn’t have my music lined up (I had the computer with my music, but no iPod to transfer to and hook up to the sound system, so I had no idea what to do.  Music needed to start at 5:30, so I ran out and got my flute (I had put it into the car last minute, not knowing why I was bringing it).  I just grabbed a hymnal out of my bag and a couple sheets of music and just started playing.  Everyone loved it.  Daphne later said that was so perfect, that it brought peace into the place (I guess instruments are rarely used for music time).  I still had no idea what I was going to say; however, I started to get an idea I was to talk on ‘freedom’, so one of the pieces I played was the Braveheart theme song.  As Daphne was praying for the food that was about to be served, I finally got the scripture I was to use: Gal. 5:1.  Wow, I was so glad God came through – talk about last minute!  Anyway, I just started speaking about freedom in my testimony – I just started speaking about the abuse I suffered and the freedom God brought me to.  That seemed to really touch a lot of people – several came up to me after and let me know what I had said really spoke to them.  I had to hang around waiting for Daphne to finish counseling a few people, so we didn’t leave until going on 8 pm.  It was such an awesome day.

These are the books we were reading (Daphne and I) Saturday morning:
Coming into Alignment by Graham Cooke  (Jesus’ mission statement:  Is. 61:1-3)  p. 62  “Jesus proclaimed two things in His mission statement: firstly, that the favor of the Lord was upon us and that vengeance was available against our enemies.  The favor of God trains and equips us to live from a place of expectancy in his goodness so we can stand in him no matter the opposition.   Vengeance is the anointing and the ability to attract favor when we are under attack.  … Beauty instead of ashes.  The oil of joy instead of mourning.  The garment of praise instead of a spirit of heaviness.   The Lord has made provision for our negative emotions.  He displaces them with His own nature.  In Christ, nothing negative may work against us.  The enemy can use negative emotions against us, which is why the Father gave us a comforter (literally someone who provides relief from pain and distress).  The Holy Spirit sooths our hearts and brings His own innate cheeriness to us.  He supports and encourages us constantly.  He brings freedom out of every situation that vexes or annoys us.  When the enemy has one purpose, God has another one … instead of being overwhelmed by what we are not, we can be overwhelmed by who Jesus is for us.  We are not consumed by the negative, we are overjoyed in the opposite. .. the ultimate vengeance on the enemy is that whatever he tries against us, only succeeds in making us bigger, better, and stronger.  ….  Occupy the Word and speak out of His abundance …” Fruit of the Spirit.  Get us out of OUR bubble and walk through the bubble with Jesus into what Jesus wants us to become.  Another level higher in Grace and Mercy.  

Radical Perceptions by Graham Cooke

The Passion Translation The Psalms Poetry on Fire

God Calling God at Eventide by Russell

When I checked my e-mail later, Reova (from Indiana) had sent this (this book has come up so much lately, I for sure have to read it again).  It’s amazing how God speaks to me like this (in books) especially in their timing!:
Lessons ‘Much Afraid’ Learned from the Shepherd 
The book, ‘Hinds Feet on High Places’, by Hannah Hurnard, is an allegory of the Christian Life as we are forced to keep company with Sorrow and Suffering.  Much Afraid and The Shepherd are climbing the Mountain of Difficulty to the High Places.  When they have reached the High Places, Much Afraid told the shepherd she learned these lessons along the way:

1.      I learned that I must accept with joy all that you allowed to happen to me on the way, and everything to which the path led me.  I was never to try to evade it but to accept it and lay down my own will on the altar.
2.      I learned I must bear all that others were allowed to do against me and to forgive with no trace of bitterness.
3.      I learned you, my Lord, never regarded me as I actually was.  You saw me as I would be when you had done what you promised.
4.      I learned every circumstance in life, no matter how crooked and distorted and ugly it appears to be, if reacted to in love, forgiveness and obedience to your will can be transformed.  You purposely allow us to be brought into contact with the bad and evil things that you want changed.
The Shepherd lovingly responded, “With this learning nothing will be able to separate you from me.” 

May all of us learn these lessons as we face sorrow and suffering!!

Also, Perry Stone ministries https://www.facebook.com/perrystonevoe/?fref=ts   I’ve been following his prophetic messages and revivals this spring/summer and have found it so encouraging!  First off, his prophetic dreams (and those he’s heard from others) all say about the same thing – the demise of what we know as America, collapse of economic and social America, etc and etc.  Not so encouraging as it goes; however, I see it as a step so much closer as in imminent of Jesus’ return!  I see what all of history has longed to see, the fulfillment of Biblical prophecy day after day and the return (as promised) of Jesus.  The Book of Revelations is being played out before our eyes every day!  Second off, the positive side is the awesome, totally Biblical (last days revival – biggest of the ages), the Holy Spirit falling on the YOUNG!  So cool!  Just as Joel prophesied – the biggest revival has fallen in other parts of the world, and is finally hitting the USA – we need this more than ever!  His revivals in West Virginia, Ohio, etc. so awesome.  

I painted this last week, Acrylic 24x30, of Tamara at Hell's Gate Canyon
I painted this 2 weeks ago, watercolors 24x28, Jacksonville House