Resurrection Sunday!

April 15-21 we spent in the Rogue Valley.  Mom's health has been up and down since her last open heart surgery in Dec. and was excited when I suggested we invite a few people over for Easter dinner (we hadn't been to the valley since January). I cooked several things that night before, while my sister-in-law cooked several things. Sunday morning, we went to Jerusalem Center in Medford – it’s amazing how strong the Holy Spirit’s presence is there at that place, full of the poor and outcast, yet rich in blessings. They had the whole outside decorated and set up (tho it threatened to rain) for Easter dinner; I kinda wished I didn’t have to rush home to prepare our own!  I wanted to hang with everyone there! However, we had a great time with family and friends, though mom wasn't feeling so well and had to go lie down.

Mom was only up ½ the day Monday, not feeling well, we painted together part of Monday.  We then tried to get through a Bob Ross video and paint with it, but she wasn’t feeling well and was down rest of day and all day Tuesday was down sick. I went with William around town Wed. and Thurs. while mom was still down and sick.

April 21 got back from mom’s by 1pm, and we went right to work on yard work since it had been the only sunny day (thus a little dried out) the whole week, so we mowed and used the weed eater on the entire property, finished up Saturday, but it sprinkled off and on.  Sunday, we didn’t go to church, because God told William in a very creative way not to go, and to quit trying to be accepted by the organized church. Sat. night, since William had to get into Elizabeth's house to take care of her plants, etc. When William was done, he accidently locked his keys in the house, the only set to the house, and by the time he realized this, it was dark and he was too tired to deal with it. The next morning, he found his keys sitting in plain sight on the table in the trailer! Now I saw him, the night before, he looked EVERYWHERE multiple times for those keys. When he found the keys, it was already 10:30, so we decided not to go to church, but rather, spend the day reading God’s Word and praying. Why is it we always want to join a fellowship? We realized we were again trying to gain approval; we are to go into the small groups to build them up, but not to ‘join’ the church part as such.

We had a wonderful, insightful day just staying home. We’ve been reading though the Books of Jasher and of Enoch also, to gain historical perspective on the Bible. Very interesting.

William started speaking about a verse he was reading: (Rom. 7:6) The letter of the law kills but the Spirit brings life …

Like William says about our trip to the valley this time, he was dealing with his family members, running around making arrangements (burial site, plaque, etc) to bury his mom May 16^th. This gives more meaning to the verse (Matt. 8:22): ‘let the dead bury the dead’; In dealing with the spiritually dead in the valley (talking about when we go back in June), when you’re not being refreshed by the breath of God, you’re dying. We realized that we were dealing with the dead when trying to deal with them about burying the dead. When we start doing what everyone else is doing, it quenches the Spirit and it isn’t that it is right or wrong, it just that God has a certain job for us to do, and it’s not what everyone else thinks is important. When we were there this week, running around dealing with ‘life’ issues everyone else is concerned about, we stopped praying and reading the Word every day. We noticed this in our spirit, that it wasn’t getting fed, we especially noticed it when we went to Jerusalem Center, then looking back after the week was done, that was the only ‘life’ we witnessed!

Getting up and involved the things that they do, we find that the message is growing in us, if we don’t pray every night listening to God’s voice, getting up in the morning and not hearing God’s voice, not hearing from the throne of God, we feel empty, we cannot live in our natural man, reason, live, but rather, we need to be moved by the Spirit, live by the Spirit, learn to hear His voice well by being in the Word daily. We cannot live in this world like others, but live by the Spirit of God because the time is short, we need the fire of God is within us, we have to tell the people that God is coming soon, the fire within cannot be contained. Like William says, there is a real burning inside of him to tell people that Jesus is coming soon and they have to be ready, something burning inside to get out there and tell people what God has to say is more important than all the stuff in this life. God chose us out of the world to be His and to do His will – this is His will, to go out and tell. The presence of God keeps us. Some people can do so many things in this life, but we have to only do what He says, speak what He says and step where He says to step. Christians think there is something wrong with us for living this way. We have to not have concern as to what people think. 

While sitting in the trailer, I see that the blossoms from the cherry and pear trees have hung on so long, and were just starting to fall. I made a comment about this to William, who said they were around longer than normal because God was speaking: they were waiting for the sun (son), it’s all in God’s timing, even they know to wait on God. Same with the dropping of the peddles, Just like we should be, as the Son shines on us, we fade away and He takes over.

Before we left for the valley, I was remembering the prayer meeting from the 13th - it was great, not as powerful as the week before, but still great. It took some interesting turns. Since I got paid from IWU that day, I invited 2 of the ladies out to lunch; however, in the end, one paid for us all! I got to know them better, which was awesome. It was such a wonderful time of talking and getting to know one another, we were there for hours! After I had gotten home, I remembered something one had said during prayer meeting, she said “God will give you new shoes” and she went on to explain that He was widening my sphere of influence and that I would have bigger shoes to fill. William kind of said the same thing the week before, saying that I would influence more people and be busier than ever. I am constantly wondering what God is going to have us do and where he will park us once we get into the Rogue Valley; not that I’m worried, I just like to know what’s coming – always been that way. I’m a planner, but God is obviously trying to get that out of me …

We’ve been really reading a lot lately, about being more vigilant in prayer: Rev. 16:15, Is. 62:6-7, Ez. 34:8-10, Matt. 24:42-51, Mark 13:33-37, Acts 20:28-31, 2 Tim. 4:1-4, 1 Peter 4:7

Wind and Rain!

Wow, it’s been a really difficult couple weeks, yet at the same time, a lot of ‘God highs’ as well. The enemy has been relentless! Constantly attacking us in many ways – horrible nights of no sleep, constant physical pain, a great deal of emotional pain in me dealing with a few issues (part with current and past – trying to be totally healed from past stuff), extremely high winds, dealing with a homeless couple we’ve been working with, etc. While at the same time, big-time God highs and provisions from God – one of which is getting more classes, which means more $$! All back to back and two overlapping, scheduled through the end of August with steady pay through Sept.! This hasn’t happened in years!! We’re getting our car’s tune-up finally this Friday – after waiting years to get this done! In two weeks, we’ll finally get the bearings done! We have waited so long for the provisions to finally fix the car, yet at the same time, God has kept our car running with NO problems all this time!

On the night of April 6^th, we had extremely high winds – at least 80-90 mph (later found out trees were down all over the county), that rocked and shook us so much, neither of us got ANY sleep. That next morning, we got a call from Elizabeth saying her tenant had no water (thought the water line was broken) and a tree fell on her house. We went up to survey the damage, and the uprooted tree took out the old water line (we found out later, it was the old one and it didn’t affect her water supply, but rather, the city had turned off the water for repairs!). The tree fell on the back corner of the house, totally crushing the corner, damaging the roof and walls! William spent 6 months working on that house! Anyway, we didn’t have the tools, nor the physical ability to do anything about it, and besides, the rains were still coming down! So Elizabeth arranged for a tree company to come out to take it down AND a construction company to come rebuild that corner of the house. Good thing, because William really is not in physical shape any longer (too old, as he says!) to do heavy construction any more.

When we went to the library later that day to get our work done (William downloads videos/sermons, etc. – I’ve got a lot more grading to do now that I’ve got so many classes now! ) Anyway, sitting out front was the homeless gal we’ve been interacting with for the past month or so (her boyfriend was still up at their camp site), she was looking very much the victim (I should have really picked up on this, but didn’t). She was upset, cold, and wet, awaiting a call back from a friend who said they would come help them get their camp moved – for I found out they were camped on someone’s private property illegally (up near Fairview), got caught and were asked to leave immediately. She thought they would move out to Bastendorff beach since she heard there was free camping. I told her, “yes, for only 24-hours, then you need to move.” She argued with me, insisting they could stay there. Anyway, I went in to do my work and about 2 hours later, came out and found her still sitting there, almost in tears. She was complaining that she was hungry, hadn’t eaten that day and they were out of food stamps. I told her that our food stamps didn’t kick in until the 8^th. I asked her what happened to the guy who was supposed to come get them last week and take them to Washington, and she said the guy ripped them off and didn’t take them to Washington. She also hadn’t heard from whoever it was that was supposed to move their camp. So I went in and asked William if it would be ok if we could help them. So William went up to Fairview and helped move their camp (all wet and stinky! With 3 cats!) and paid for 2 nights out at Sturdevant park, moved their camp down there – it took 2 loads. They made William do all the work! They hardly did a thing for themselves! 

I, in the mean time, was at the trailer, getting together a couple grocery bags full of food, including some of my canned and dried stuff. After William came down with the 2^nd load, he stopped by to get me to get my help to help them set up their new camp. We suggested they should camp in the shelter of the treed area in the back of the park due to the fact that the high winds were to come back again that night. They didn’t listen to us, set their camp up along the river on a hill, right in direct line with all the winds! Of course, when we came to check on them the next day, their tent was flattened, all their stuff spread all over the place and wet, she was sitting under the gazebo wet and miserable, and he was supposed to be at the library looking for another BLM site to move to. She said how around 1 am everything got soaked and flattened and they ended up inside the bathrooms for the night. It was still pouring rain off and on, so I said I’d help them move the camp to behind the bathroom (the park host said they could), so I went to the library and got her boyfriend, who had fallen asleep in the library. I made them pack up their own stuff, but I helped load it into my car and take 4 loads over to behind the bathroom (our car is REALLY stinky now!) I told them that William would be down the next morning to help them get to Bastendorff Beach, but they were to get their stuff ready on their own and be ready when William got there ( we were realizing at this point, they hardly do a thing to help themselves, but rather, wait for someone else to do all their work and providing for). Of course, the next morning they were not ready and William said he’d give them 2 hours. 2 ½ hours later, he went down there and they had done NOTHING to get ready! William was real fed up at this point, but kept his temper, got their stuff all loaded to do in 1 trip, put the last of our money into the gas tank and took them to Bastendorff. He again said to them that they were now on their own and that they could only stay at that camp site for 24 hours! They disagreed. Whatever, they were now on their own. We did what we could to help them!

In the mean time, William and I had been dealing with several days of the enemy’s attack on us and by this time we were under a deep exhaustion! Lack of sleep at nights due to tormenting spirits and dealing with these people, absolutely exhausted us! So much so, we kept falling asleep throughout the day, each day, but never sleeping for any length of time, night or day. At the same time, my blow-up mattress had deflated earlier in the week, the hard bed caused me a great deal of pain, keeping me awake, etc. and etc. I finally was able to go to Coos Bay yesterday to exchange that mattress and last night slept for the first time in over a week!

Last Thurs. morning’s (6^th) prayer meeting was very powerful. This is one of the things we know and realize is that the farther we advance in the Kingdom of God, the harder the enemy of the kingdom of darkness tries to fight back. That’s what’s going on, we know it, they know it, but they should realize by now that we’re not backing down. Like William says, “bring it on!” But, they just like to try to make us miserable; however, through all of it, we keep praising God, singing, throwing scriptures about in this battle and making them run! Anyway, we felt the Holy Spirit show up at the prayer meeting in such a powerful way, not only William, but others were weeping. Humility was the main topic of the day. William ended up flat on the floor because God kept telling him to “get low, get low”. I’ve noticed that lately (that day, and others) that my speaking in tongues has increased and is sounding different at times. Anyway, it was such a powerful time, and we are so thankful to have this group to meet with each week.

Because we were dealing with those homeless people and fighting such exhaustion/emotional issues, etc., we didn’t go to Palm Sunday services at the Foursquare, but stayed home, prayed, fasted, and tried to sleep. I guess when William went to the men’s bible study early Tuesday morning, that was the first thing the pastor had asked was, “where were you guys?” William filled them in on the homeless situation. We had met with the pastor and his wife last Wed. night (5^th) and spent a good 2 ½ hrs talking with them about who we are and what we wanted to do at Sturdenvant park on June 10^th and the Gay 90’s event on June 3^rd. Like we said, we’re not there to ‘come under their banner’ so to speak, but to come along side to help their congregation any way we can AND to invite them to what we want to do for their city. Last Sunday (2^nd) after church, we had gone to the Sturdevant park and prayed over it, asking God for more direction as to what He wants us to do down there. We had a great, powerful prayer/praise time the rest of that day.

Coquille Valley is so green!

This past Monday (10^th) I met with the ladies at Figero’s again for Bible/discipleship time – again it was powerful. Not only did the leader mention that since William and I have started coming to their church/various groups, they have risen to a new spiritual level that was very noticeable. Again, the topic centered around humility and discernment. So many great verses were discussed and experiences of various things God has done, were brought up. I mentioned how I wollowed in self-pity and victim mentality while going through my healing period in the 90’s, but with God’s help, I rose out of it. I also recounted the homeless situation this week and told of what we learned from that episode: that some people just don’t want to take responsibility for their own lives, don’t want to help themselves, sit in their victim mentality, whining for someone to rescue them. I was a sucker for that this week, in my desire to help, I only enabled them. She mentioned (and others said it too) that I had such a spirit of Mercy on me, that I need to learn discernment on this sort of thing. I totally agree. Then, she asked another member to pray over me in this area because she too has been anointed to the healing ministry, not only that, but knows about victimization and is learning still to work on boundaries. Such a great and powerful time that morning.

This past week, God has continued to teach me from II Samuel and I Chronicles. One thing that we are well aware of in dealing with the spiritual realm, that where there are great victories in God, we cannot get careless about walking closely and in constant communion with God, because the enemy is right there ready to claim any ‘relapse’ and devour us. In the story of David (II Sam. 11 and 12), he had a series of small lapses in his character/daily communion with God, which then, of course, led to the BIG one. That didn’t make him bad all of a sudden, just human. We all need to watch for those little things that lead to the big one and cut it off before it happens. The cool thing, though, is if we fail, God is always there, ready to pick us up, forgive and cleanse us! God’s response to humble submission, continued trust, and a contrite heart (Ps. 51:10, 17) and he WILL renew a right spirit in us!

Like right now (this past week or so), we could just give into this exhaustion and quit praying/seeking God’s will/rattling the enemy’s cage by joining with other believers, and maybe this onslaught will stop. Just because we are constantly getting attacked by the enemy, doesn’t mean we are out of the will of God (as in David’s case here), we are in a spiritual battle and we are fighting back in the power of the Holy Spirit, in God’s will, but us being human, we get wore out! We’re making the enemy MAD and he’s trying to make us quit! But we won’t! That is where we have to go to God for a time of rest and restoration (we’ve been taking a lot of naps lately!). The most important part of restoration is prayer, worship, and praise! That is what is so cool about David and the Psalms, that whenever he has a ‘human moment’, he goes right to God, pours out his soul and gets restored! I have found that when I pray the Psalms, I get immediate relief: Ps. 7, 69, 109, 142 - 144 are great to use against the spirits of depression, loneliness, fear, envy, discouragement of any sort – all temptations, in fact. Ps. 72, 73, 74 (and others) are great to pray on behalf of the poor and outcast. And of course, for expressing our love, thankfulness, and joy to God: Ps. 1, 8, 9, 16, 19, 23, 103, etc. And so on, the Psalms are great for all occasions.

Dreams

I had the weirdest dream last night; it consisted of several parts, very busy, but I couldn’t remember most of it. The part I did remember was that I was standing on the beach in this flowing dress, holding a blue veil blowing in the wind. It was very long and kept bouncing off the sand, but as I held it, blowing in the wind behind me, I brought it over my head and it waved behind me, again touching the sand.

I told it to William and he immediately had an interpretation for it: “you standing on the beach represents you in the world putting your face toward God. The veil is the Spirit of God who protects and gives vision and sanctifies you. As you draw close to God, the veil is brought over you – the Holy Spirit. The wind is the cleansing of the Spirit, to perform the deeds of God. As you allow the Spirit to remove all of your past, you become empowered and used more and more by God. The veil blowing in length, is the past being put farther and farther behind you. When it touches the sand, it is the Spirit of God flowing out of you touching the people God will use you for reaching. The sand represents the souls of men and women who will be changed by that. Keep yourself in His presence!”

Which reminded me of another dream I had a few weeks ago; I can’t remember exactly when, but I don’t think it was past the middle of March. It was very vivid; I was lying in a bed, covered in blankets. I looked down on myself and saw a baby rattler slithering up toward me. In the next scene, I was standing outside and I saw this same baby rattler trying to get on me; it came up on me and ended up on my back right shoulder about ready to bite me on my upper arm. At that same time while it was crawling up on me, I noticed William aways off and I was trying to get to him before it crawled up on me to get it off. I got to him just as it got to my shoulder about to bite. I had him swat it off. I kept hearing the words: “be vigilant, be vigilant” over and over throughout the dream. Then I woke up, not really afraid, no fear really, just irritated more than anything. That morning, I told William the dream and he immediately had an interpretation. “A baby rattler is more poisonous than a full grown one. It represents the enemy, trying to get to us, on us, and stop us. It is persistent, but we are to be on guard, be vigilant, so he doesn’t inflict his poison into us and stop us from doing what God wants us to do.”

Pear and Cherry blossoms in the orchard!

I continue to read I and II Samuel. I find that David’s heart is so pure, how can we even attain to such? In looking at the life of Christ, I see His whole life as so pure, how can we even attain to such? The answer, of course, is that we can’t on our own. Jesus has and always will be the answer. Without the power of the Holy Spirit, can we be made into the new creation that God promised.

So, in reading through the beautiful poetry of “the Song of the Bow” as it is called (II Sam. 1:18-27), shows us the true heart of David – that he had no animosity toward Saul for all the years (14 years running from Saul/22 years to wait according to the commentators – first anointed at age 16 and he was 38 when he became king) of suffering at his hands. What also struck me in that through his writings (the psalms), David worked through his anger, dismay, hurt, fear, etc. by writing. He got it out in the open, dealt with it, then was done. That is how it’s been in my life – I have always kept journals, and through all the years of abuse I suffered, I used the pen to purge out all the anger, dismay, hurt, fear, etc. in my own life, so as to not let bitterness take root and destroy me. I used that tool of writing to work through all the negative in my world, re-focus on God and all the positives in my life, thus then, to grow in Christ through the power of the Holy Spirit, to overcome and to emerge in power, joy, and in victory.

My character changed and grew through the years of misery. Sure, I called the years of the 90’s “my anger decade” where my endurance was tested through the injustice and misery I experienced of my situation, but I didn’t remain a victim, I emerged with a better character, which is why I love that verse in II Peter 1:3-11 (ESV):

His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire. For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. For whoever lacks these qualities is so nearsighted that he is blind, having forgotten that he was cleansed from his former sins. Therefore, brothers, be all the more diligent to make your calling and election sure, for if you practice these qualities you will never fall. For in this way there will be richly provided for you an entrance into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

In seeing how David waited patiently over those 7 ½ years of ruling only Judah (rather than the promised entire kingdom), I see how in all circumstances, I have to wait on God’s timing and not try to take it in my own power, and thus, get out of God’s will. God has a timing for all He does. William and I have been in waiting now for 4 years, waiting until God said to “Go” and take the Rogue Valley in Jesus’ name. William’s time (2003-13) and mine (2008-13) there was a time of preparation, learning, and laying the groundwork, thus, not wasted. God has confirmed His call on us to get back to preaching by not only sustaining us all these years, then providing ALL that we need (though on paper, we’ve lived in extreme poverty), we’ve been more richly blessed in all aspects (rich doesn’t always mean money!!), we have all that we need and count it all joy to live the way we do. But God is showing us that money is increasing through my work online – for the first time in years, I am booked with classes through August and pay through September! That hasn’t happened since 2010.

In regard to worship, the work we do for God, our worship of Him must be according to His plan. Ignorance isn’t acceptable (Matt. 22:29, regarding ignorance of the OT or God’s power) in 1 Samuel 6, we learn that David was ignorant of how to handle the Ark of the Covenant which represented God’s Divine Presence to the people at that time. Today, are we any different when we come to God’s table? When we take communion, we must come with a pure heart – one empty of self – we cannot take this lightly or with carelessness. We come to communion after doing a search of our hearts, to come to God asking for forgiveness of all unclean things in our life, then we can partake (I Cor. 11:18-32). Then we can enter into this time of joyful worship to God in true thankfulness. Overall, what I learn from David is that we are continually engaged in spiritual warfare (Eph. 6:10-18) and in order to overcome, we must have our spiritual armor on (Rom. 8:35-39).

Anniversary!

It’s been a very interesting couple weeks. Since I got paid this last Friday , William and I decided to go to Bandon that day to celebrate our anniversary (which is our 5^th on the 5^th - the number for Grace!) because the weather was awesome – sunny and 59 degrees (and predictions were for Wed. to be rainy). We had a wonderful day; started out going to Coos Bay/Charleston to take our showers, do a bit of shopping, then down 101 to Bandon. It was spring break for many of the schools in OR, so the town/beach was very busy with lots of people. We went to the beach for a short time, but the wind made it seem VERY cold! We went into the Face Rock Creamery for the first time and sampled cheeses (wow, great stuff) and then to Cranberry Sweets to sample wonderful candies (after all these years coming to this area, we’ve never checked those places out before), wandered around town and then ended the day with a most wonderful meal at the Edgewaters Restaurant – upstairs with a wonderful view of the bay/lighthouse. Wow, such a treat! It is such a rare thing to go out to dinner any more, let alone to a fancy restaurant! 

Sunny, but cold in Bandon!

Something interesting this past Wednesday – God taught me a lesson through it. First off, it was pouring rain Wed. morning, but William and I had such a blessed morning praying, watching some online sermons, etc. Originally, I wanted to go to the Art Center at 10 to join the quilting ladies, then go over and paint with Pat and the other ladies there; HOWEVER, we got so into God and discussion/prayer, etc. that I didn’t get to the Art Center until almost noon. Pat was already gone for the day because no one came in to paint, so I went in to see who was still in the quilting room. Most were getting ready to leave, so I sat and chatted those who were still there. This one lady wanted to keep working for another couple hours, but didn’t have a key and no one else wanted to stay, so I told her that I would sit there and keep her company, that I had a key, and that I would just work on the care quilts. Since I hadn’t chatted with her before, being the nervous time sometimes that I am when meeting someone new, I just got to chatting away (after everyone left) like I do about everything I’d been learning with God, totally not paying any attention to her reaction, just chat, chat, chat (I don’t know why I do that sometimes, totally running off at the mouth) and all of a sudden, she spoke loudly, “Stop talking like that, I didn’t come here to be preached at!” Wow, that really stopped me instantly! I realized what I had been doing and said that I was sorry, that I didn’t realize … I apologized for not paying attention, not apologizing for WHAT I was saying, just how I was going about it. God really spoke to me about that in that I need to see where THEY are at, not just chat away (and I realized that I was doing it out of nervousness). Anyway, so I asked about her and we ended up having a great couple hours just talking about various things, our lives, etc. What really struck me about this whole thing, was that just that morning I was really asking God to ‘watch’ my mouth for me, to only let what HE wanted me to say come out, to be a blessing to others, etc. I really need God to help remind me about this ALL the time!

We’ve been going to the Foursquare Church the past couple Sundays and REALLY connecting with the people, it’s been awesome! Anyway, we went to the fellowship this morning (today was such a beautiful sunny day – there’s been so few this winter, so it was such a blessing) and I was able to hug on several people and thank one of the prayer team for her many years of dedication and perseverance, not only to that fellowship, but for not giving up in prayer. The prayer team has been meeting there for many decades (ups and downs over the years), prophetic prayer, knowing God was going to do a great thing in this area (and has over the years, brought unity to most all of Coquille’s fellowships with a great move in the 90’s). I told her how we were so encouraged to come to this fellowship, the prayer meetings, discipleship meeting, etc. (William’s been going to the men’s bible study), the presence of the Holy Spirit amongst the members, to finally find people in this area who were on fire! She said that they were encouraged by us telling them that they were on the right track (I’ve heard various members saying how they thought they weren’t doing anything, not impacting people, wish they were other places, etc.) and she was especially encouraged that we confirmed that yes, God is about to do something very big in this area.

Thursday’s prayer meeting at the Foursquare church was especially awesome. I had gone last week by myself to check it out (William wanted to know if there were any men going) and there were several ladies and one man. When I got home, I told William it was the type of prayer meeting that was right up our alley and that there was a guy attending! He was excited to attend this week. We had some very awesome prayer time and William noticed that when he spoke over or prayed over certain things, that this other lady would jump in and confirm/add to – they just really connected in the Spirit. When he talked with her afterward, he found out that she also is a Prophet(ess)/Evangelist. She was lamenting to him how she felt so ineffective over the years, feeling restricted to this area, like everywhere else was more exciting. And that she felt that she was missing something. William was able to confirm in her that she was in the right place at the right time and to keep doing what God is asking her to do. She had also gone to Betty Denny’s I-5 event a couple weeks ago with a couple other people from this fellowship, had attended the Jerusalem Center for Sunday Service and was massively impacted by the move of the Holy Spirit there, of Dave and Gayleen’s ministry; felt such a kinship with everyone there in the Rogue Valley she had met. Anyway, she was so thrilled that we were connected with the same people. Something cool also happened there toward the end of the prayer meeting, she spoke some words over William and I, and another lady spoke some words over me. They both said several things and what I remember was that (I can’t remember who said it) she saw us covered by a black cloak with a hood, which represented being covered by God’s wings of protection and that we were hidden from the enemy (in the spiritual world), being protected, and that from behind us, walking beside us, and in 2 columns ahead of us were angels, like a spear going into dark territory, pushing through passage wherever we went. Wow, that blew me away. Then one of the ladies said she saw the enemy with this huge log, pounding William’s back, like a battering ram, trying to wear him down, break him down both physically and spiritually. This too, was so right on. What she said over me was so right on perfect and for me anyway, a finish work of what was started last Sunday night with that visiting evangelist. I don’t remember everything she said over me, but one thing I remember was that she said she saw in the Spirit, that I had these whip marks on my back from past abuse and that God was stripping them totally off of me, she said it was like tape being peeled off and the marks would no longer affect me. I totally felt that as well, like that was the final cleansing of the past, that I would no longer be held back in any way from anything done to me. Other things were said, but I can’t remember them all.

Coquille Valley - too much rain!!

Anyway, I went to Monday’s meeting, I felt to encourage the one lady I prayed over last week in a couple things, as well as give her the handout of “101 healing scriptures”. She said that she felt like I was picking on her, which I totally didn’t mean to do, only reminded her of one thing I had spoken to her the week before about, and that the only reason I said what I did, was because I told her I totally saw myself in her from when I was going through my healing process. I was only saying what I did to help her in her healing process. She totally understood, yet at the same time, doesn’t seem to like me (still a stranger in some ways) pointing things out to her. I told her I understood. At the end of the meeting, she gave me a hug, so I guess that means I’ve been forgiven. I’ve got to learn how to interact with people when trying to help them. I realize that in my eagerness to help, I come off too strong. I really need God to guide me so completely in this area, that I can’t let my eagerness get ahead of what God is doing, even though I know God is using me in this area.

Last Sunday night, we went back to the Foursquare to see a visiting evangelist (Roger Smets Evangelistic Ministries) who wasn’t really there to preach, but rather, to speak words over people God tells him to speak over. Anyway, after speaking over a few people, he chose William to come up and the Words spoken over him were so perfect. Then it was my turn (he didn’t choose everyone at the meeting, maybe half) and the words spoken over me were so perfect: Ps. 34:22, 126:5, 3:3, Phil. 3:12-14, Isaiah 61:3 & 7, John 15:11, 1 Peter 4:19, with the overall theme “I AM well”. It was so awesome, too, that not only did he put his hand on my head and speak in tongues (he didn’t do this to anyone else), but kept saying that God was going to pour such complete healing in me, such blessing into me, that He would restore everything the enemy has stolen from be double-fold! I received that and felt so ‘healed’ and complete after that, it was refreshing – like a complete work was finally done! I don’t think about the past often and for the most part, have been healed of everything. The thing I had been upset/discouraged about the past few months is the status between me and my girls. I lamented the fact that how I poured my life into them their growing up years, and now that all but shun me, shutting me out of their lives almost completely, to where my grandkids don’t even know me (my daughters don’t know me either, for that matter). I felt like that area was so healed this week (esp. after Thurs.), that I don’t even give it another thought. God WILL restore all that the enemy has stolen from me.

God even further pointed out to me in today’s reading of 2 Samuel 10-20: I’ve been getting revelation by God pointing out to me generational sins and their consequences, even though God forgives us when asked, there are still consequences. He pointed out to me how I shunned my mom all those years  when I was trying to escape my past at 18 by moving so far away, then all those years in the 80’s-90’s where I had so little contact with her due to my pain of past abuse and it being ‘her fault’, etc. Of course, I totally forgave her in 1998 and a more complete forgiveness/restoration in 2002, and then so completely accepting her (never bringing up the past) over these past years since 2007 of me being in OR. That even though my being abused all those years wasn’t my fault, I did forgive, I am now reaping the consequences by my own kids shunning me. Not only that, but what I realized, my mom did that to her own mom as well (though not as many years as I did). What really got me these past few months (and I’m over it now) was how I didn’t give them reason for shunning me – I didn’t abuse them, but rather, protected them! Either way, God will redeem the years and restore, but in HIS time, not mine. In the mean time, I just love them where they are and when (and if) they contact me, treat them as if nothing ever happened. Not only learning to accept God’s timing in all this and the consequences of this particular sin, but to be glad in God’s chastisement of me – it is all for HIS glory and my benefit.

Something really cool this morning; prior to going to church, William was cleaning out some of the papers found in a bible he’s had since the 80’s, which mark his growth in the Lord, he found a sympathy card (for the death of his wife, Theresa, in 1995) from a church he went to 25 years ago - New Horizon Christian Church in Coquille! William realized how God has taken him full circle in this area (Coos Bay/Coquille), in that, God is calling us to not only participate again in the Gay 90’s even in June, but to go even farther and do 1 or 2 weekends of preaching/old fashioned tent revival type thing in the park after that event. As we went down there to the Sturdavant park this afternoon after church, to pray over that gazebo area, claiming it in Jesus’ name, he realized that while he was attending New Horizons years ago as a youth group leader, he used to take the kids down here to the park to play, do activities, etc. AND he remembered how he took them to a Guardian’s concert in North Bend. Not only that, but as we drove home and went to the corner of 8^th and Elliott, we realized THAT was the same church we attended a couple times last November! He said that what threw him off is that the building doesn’t look the same (he can’t place exactly what), especially on the inside – maybe an extra wall was added between the sanctuary and a back room, he doesn’t know. Either way, we were blown away by what God is doing here (in Coquille) and in us!